literature

A Christmas Story

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Literature Text

"Herr Pyro. Vould you come here, bitte?"

Medic huffed slightly, rubbing at his temples. Really. This was beginning to get seriously out of hand. It was understood that the firestarter could be something of an overgrown child at times (causing his behavior to range from the adorable to the downright disturbing, depending on the setting, though Medic found it strangely endearing when he would giggle at enflamed Spies or use his fire ax to play 'go for distance' with the BLU's heads) but… really.

Presently, the masked individual came trotting up to the infirmary door, dripping with an air of playfulness.

"Hrrlrr, Mrrdrrc!"

"Guten Tag." Sigh. "Listen. I am coming to ze realization zat it is getting close to Christmas. Und I know you ah disappointed at not getting stationed at Coldfront zis yeah. But you ah going to extremes to make up for it, und it simply vill not do."

Pyro shuffled a bit. Normally he didn't mind where RED Team got stationed, but this time of year, there was no place like Coldfront. All the beautiful sparkly snow looked just like one of those cookie tins with the little buttery cookies inside, like the starshaped ones, or the flaky ones… oooh, or the ones that looked like little pretzels only covered with sugar and not salt… where were we again? Oh yeah. He tilted his head to the side.

"Rrrt wrrnt?"

"Nein. It von't. For vun thing, zere is ze matter of Herr Demo's stickybombs. Ve need all ze ammunition ve have for battle. Und besides, using hot glue to make live explosives into ornaments is probably not ze safest idea, jungen."

Pyro gave a sigh. He'd found a bent-up fake tree in 2Fort's basement, along with a lot of dust, boxes of documents labled TOP SECRET, a few warheads, stacks of old newspapers, moth-eaten old uniforms, and what looked to be an old, rusting space pod. Typical basement stuff. No ornaments, though, so he'd simply had to make do with what he could find laying around. The usual, you know… popcorn strings, paper chains, your teammate's shiny red round bombs… like you do.

"Und zen ve have ze issue of ze Yule Log. Vun in ze fireplace vould be acceptable. Zere does not need to be vun in every room of ze fort."

Shrug. If one pretty burning log was nice, wasn't a whole bunch of them even better? I mean, maybe there really didn't NEED to be one in the corner of the showers, but it DID make it awful nice and toasty in there…

"Zen, zere ah… zese."

Medic holds up a large platter of somewhat singed cookies, covered in plastic wrap and marked with a tag reading 'TO BLU TEAM'.

"It should go vithout saying zat, as good intentioned as your motives may have been, zis sort of thing could get you in a lot of trouble, Pyro. Even if you didn't get yourself killed trying to bring zem across ze bridge, zis sort of gesture could count as treason. Do you know vhat zat is, jungen? Ve cannot give aid und comfort to ze enemy. Zat is rudimentary."

Pyro hangs his head a little, his mumble soft and a little guilty.

"Rrr jrrst wrrntrrd rrt trr brr nrrce. Nrrbrrdr's grrng hrrrm, yrr knrr."

The German sighed, pinching at the bridge of his nose.

"I know, jungen, I know. But zat is ze sad state of ze virld, ja? Var does not get called off for holidays. Var does not care if it is Christmas. Or summer vacation. Or anyzing like zat. Und since ve ah at var, ve must be practical."

"Mrrdrrc. Crrstmrrs drrsrnt crr rrf thrrs a wrr rrn."

His hands clenched into stubborn fists, Pyro looked at Medic straight on, eyes behind smoked glass flashing.

"Crrnt yrr rrvrr lrrk rrn thrr brrt srrd? Drr yrr rrlwrrs hrrv trr brr srr srrrs? Rrr knrr wrr rrt wrr. Brrt thrrt drrsrrnt mrrn rrm nrrvrr grrnrr brr hrrprr. Yrr mrr thrrnk rrm wrrstrrng trrm, Mrrdrrc, brrt thrrs… thrrs rrs RRMPRRTRRNT trr mrr. Rrrnd rr brrt rrt mrrks thrr rrthrrs hrrprr, trr. Srrr… srr rrf yrr drrnt lrrk rrt, thrrn jrrst srrk rrt rrp frr rr frr drrs, yrr… yrr… SCRRRRGE!"

Breaths huffted in and out of the mask. He wasn't used to outright ranting like that, and it was probably the most he'd said at one stretch in a long time, if not ever. But he believed every single word of it. He didn't need to be reminded there was a war on- it looked them squarely in the face everyday. What everyone- every one of them, even the Team in the fort on the other side of the moat- REALLY needed was a reminder that there was something in this world that WASN'T war. Something that was still precious, and happy, and peaceful.

Medic sighed, shaking his head, and cracked a small grin in spite of himself.

"…alright, Pyro. Alright. If you feel zat strongly about it, ve vill come to a compromise. Keep your tree. Have Herr Demo disarm ze… ornaments for you. You may have VUN yule log. Any ozzer decorations you vant, use sparingly. Und as for zis… token of goodvill of yours… ach, you ah going to make me regret zis, jungen… if you must leave it over zere, go in through ze tunnels und don't be caught. Santa Claus is nevah seen leaving gifts, is he?"

"Nrr! Brrt… wrrt rrbrrt thrr…"

Medic rolled his eyes.

"Jungen, aren't you a bit old to believe stories about tentaspies? If such a creature existed, I vould have caught him und studied him by now."

Pyro chuckled a little, brightening like a little flame unto himself.

"Yrr rrrly mrrn rr crrn…"

"Ja. Deliver your cookies if it vill make you happy. Have your Christmas. You ah right… perhaps it vould be good for team morale if nuzzing else.

A squeal of delight echoed through the halls, and Pyro grabbed Medic by the hand, running down the hall with him, stopping under a certain doorway.

"Und vhat ah you doing now?"

Giggling, the firestarter lifted his mask ever slightly.

"Thank you, Mr. Grinch."

And leaning forward, he planted a big smooch on the German's cheek before running off, laughing giddily. Sighing, Medic glanced upward. Just as he'd suspected. He started to reach up, but then shook his head, striding back to the infirmary.

Might as well let him have his mistletoe, too.
Yes, a bit late for the holidays, I know. :3 This was actually a gift for TF2Chan's Secret Santa. The request was for something sweet involving Medic and Pyro. It's sweet and fluffy as cotton candy. Enjoy!
© 2011 - 2024 indyrabbit
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Kraving4games's avatar
I can no understand Pyro!!! :(